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Santa buys a cute little Filly (female horse under the age of four) that he plans on racing next season, but when he gets her home, his old Stallion (an adult male horse which is used for breeding) smells her and wants her and starts kicking up dust. Santa doesn`t want her knocked up, because she won`t be able to race, so he calls the vet.
The vet tells him to tie a bedsheet around the fiilly`s rump to keep the stallion away. So that day, Santa does just that. The next day, Santa goes out to the corral to make sure the vet`s solution worked, but the filly`s nowhere to be found. Santa follows her hoof trail to the neighbor`s farm, and sees the neighbor`s kid out by their barn.
"Hey boy, did you see a filly run by with a bedsheet tied around her rump?" Santa asks.
The kid replies, "No sir, but one dashed past here early this morning with a handkerchief sticking out of her butt!"
- Emergency brakes! An Amish lady is trotting down the road in her horse and buggy when she is pulled over by a cop.
'Ma`am, I`m not going to ticket you, but I do have to issue you a warning. You have a broken reflector on your buggy.'
'Oh, I`ll let my husband, Jacob, know as soon as... - Turning him on Two old ladies were chatting one day. They were talking about this and that and the subject finally got around to sex.
The first old lady said she enjoyed sex now just as much as ever.
The second old lady was surprised and asked her what her secret was.
The first old lady said when she hears her husband pulling the car into the garage she hurries and takes a... - Tongue tied There were three priests in a railroad station, all wanting to go home to Pittsburg. Behind the ticket counter was a very, very shapely lass...well endowed, gorgeous, amazing. The priests were all in embarrassing new territory, so they drew straws to determine who would get the tickets.
The first priest approached the window. 'Young lady... - Happiness Once there was a philosopher doing a survey on a group of men, on the topic of happiness. He said 'I can prove to you that the amount of happiness has relation to the amount of sex you have!'
To prove this he glanced at the audience. And he saw a man at the right hand corner, smiling, 'Sir, How often do you have... -
Castrating Headache Santa was moderately successful in his career, but as he got older he was increasingly hampered by incredible headaches. When his personal hygiene and love life started to suffer, he sought medical help. After being referred from one specialist to another, he finally came across a doctor, Dr. Banta who offered a solution: